The Coaching Connection

Who Is To Blame? The Power of Parenting

Jim Burson blog The Coaching Connection; The Power of Parenting;

What is the power of parenting?

Children and young kids are different today! They have no respect; they don’t listen; they have smart mouths, tattoos, music that is horrible; they are into drugs and alcohol; and are much more susceptible to opiate addictions. They seem to be getting blamed for all our problems!

So I ask again: who is really at fault? The general answer is simple. We all are! Children are a product of our culture and our society. They tend to be like we are and what we allow them to get away with.

A lot of children start behind the 8 ball by where they were born, who their parents are and the limited choices they have. So who can help solve this? Good luck.

Some have a great chance. Is that just luck or providence?

My parents were poor. They had seven kids. We just danced on the poverty line, but Mom and Dad loved us, disciplined us, demanded and expected things of us. They were good parents who had their own faults and shortcomings, but because I felt their love and concern, I challenged myself to become better, to get an advanced education and all of my brothers and sisters have been successful in their own way. We were lucky and poor, but lucky because of parents.

There are a lot of young people who are starting with parents that have drug problems. They don’t love themselves or their children. Maybe we need to really look at how we can fix the parent concerns that we all know. There are no easy answers but to blame, be angry at or to even hate poor parents is not the answer. Instead, we need to ask ourselves, each other and them, “How can we help?”

One thing we can do is show examples of what good parenting really is. It’s not about giving children everything they want or about not disciplining them, but of making sure that mom and dad love and care for them.

The Power of Parenting

Jim Burson blog The Coaching Connection; Who Is To Blame-The Power of Parenting; www.JimBurson.comMy neighbors Kristi and Nate have three young daughters: twins Reagan and McKinley are 6 years old and Kennedy is 4. They are beautiful, wonderful kids who have the same problems all youngsters have at that age. They can almost drive you crazy and test your patience every day, but they have special parents!! As their close neighbor, I watch and smile at the chaos and and at the patience exhibited by Kristi and Nate.

The morning after we returned from a recent two-week vacation, the three girls ran outside at 8:00 AM, yelling “Coach Buhson, will you and Miss Jennifer come and walk us to school?” The twins are new to kindergarten and their little sister is going to ‘college’ at the university-run preschool on campus down the block from our homes. “Let me check with Jennifer,” I answered. Of course Jennifer quickly agreed and the three girls, their mom, Jennifer and I headed down the street.

I asked if I could stay and go to class all morning with them; they said, “Oh no, Coach Buhson!” “But I need to work on my alphabet!” I replied. We laughed and enjoyed the walk. We dropped Kennedy off at preschool and then proceeded to skip and jump down the hill to the elementary school. It was a beautiful, sunny September day and we arrived several minutes early, all excited.

Jim Burson blog The Coaching Connection; Who Is to Blame? The Power of Parenting; www.JimBurson.comThen Kristi called us all to huddle up. We touched hands in the center. This caught Jennifer and me a little off guard, but the problems and concerns of the world dropped thousands of miles away as she crouched to eye-level with her daughters, looked in their eyes, said, “McKinley and Reagan, what are we going to do today?” They both said, “We’re going to find someone who needs a friend and be that friend.”

“Great,” said mom. “And what else?”

They both giggled and said, “Make Mrs. Allred’s [the teacher] job easier.” They looked at us and said, “Thank you for walking to school with us.”

Then we raised our clasped hands in the air and everyone shouted, “Team work makes the dream work!”

Reagan and McKinley smiled, showing a couple of lost front teeth, and ran gleefully toward school!

I feel great joy, trust and belief in the power of parenting. I even noticed a tear in Jennifer’s eyes. Maybe we can’t change the world – maybe we can. Find a neighbor, a friend, or someone who needs a friend, and walk their children to school.

Parenting On!

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7 Responses to Who Is To Blame? The Power of Parenting

  1. Butc h kobel December 3, 2018 at 5:17 am #

    Great post coach. Hope all is well.
    Butc h Kobel

  2. Diane Whitis December 3, 2018 at 6:48 am #

    Good reading. Forwarded it to my son, in GA, who adopted a little four year old boy this past year.

  3. Barb Beddard December 3, 2018 at 7:26 am #

    Thank you coach this made tears come to my eyes. My granddaughter lives with her other grandmother where she has the basics food and a bed. My son and her mother have drug addiction, he is in a good rehab program and who knows about her mother. But I do my best to be a good grandmother and have her a lot, she struggles with school work, but is doing better. But two times I have went to her school for some kind of school program both times one little girl has been crying because no one was there for her and I have went over and talked with her with and a couple of hugs makes your heart hurt and never forget her. Thank you for another great story you and Ms Jennifer are wonderful people, God Bless

  4. Terry December 3, 2018 at 11:45 am #

    Coach Burson, Great article! We All must do our part to help our society become a better place! Good Parenting is the first step in raising good children! I enjoy your articles and your passion to make this world a better place!

  5. Sue Burson Argo December 3, 2018 at 4:05 pm #

    With heavy heart – I so enjoyed this article written by one of the nicest, kindness, caring, loving man I know – my brother….Miss Jennifer kinda cook, too….love both of you and envy that sweet little family that have you two for neighbors….love and hugs…..

  6. Linda Trees December 3, 2018 at 7:27 pm #

    This was a great writing, Jim! Life is so different from when we were kids…..most of us were just like the Bursons! We were all close and cared about each other! Kids now live in larger towns, go to larger schools, both parents work, something going on every day.,,,,,,busy, busy life and it’s hard on kids and parents ☹️ We, as parents and grandparents need to keep spreading the kind of love we had ( more love than material things) ….. what a wonderful couple you have next door…they get it !! You did a wonderful job speaking at Charlie’s funeral…thank you ❤️❤️❤️Xo

  7. Becky Kearns December 4, 2018 at 12:59 pm #

    Hi – I’m McKinley, Regan and Kennedy’s grandmother. (Nate’s mom) I can’t begin to tell you how much I love this blog! I love the way you’ve written about my sweet family. They truly are special. And I would feel that way about them even if they weren’t family 🙂 Nate and KJ are teaching the kids about God, family and country — and I think that’s so important in today’s day and age. It encompasses all relationships and situations. We need so much more of this in our families. We’ve become an entitled “all about me” nation and we need to get back to basics. Thank you so much for your thoughts on parenting, your kind words and for being such incredible neighbors and friends to Nate, KJ and the girls. They love you and your wife dearly – thank you!