The Coaching Connection

4 Steps to Having the Power to Connect

Jim Burson blog post; Monday Coaching Connection: 4 Steps to Having the Power to Connect;

Do you have the power to connect?

Everyone needs the power to connect and bring together those people who make up the fabric of your life. As a coach you want to connect with your players at their level and skill set and lift them toward your dreams of having players improve, the team improve, develop their knowledge and love of the game .. and of course win. The same is true for a teacher and her students or a mom and dad with their children.

Parenting, coaching, teaching and bossing have different pathways to bring people together. Each has its own challenges and they are all difficult. You must accept each challenge as you find it may have their differences, but all different, but the ability to find pathways to bring people together and connect them to your goals and dreams and make them believe in you and themselves can be a difficult challenge indeed.

You must prepare daily so you’ll be ready when that child arrives or that special student appears or that great player says, “Come on, Coach!”

4 steps to prepare you to have the power to connect


You must have toughness as you teach and learn new skills, whether it’s as simple as changing diapers or as complex as explaining the origin and insertion of the sternocleidomastoideus. One way to show toughness is to model the behavior you expect from others – language, discipline, healthy eating, caring for others. When people see this kind of toughness, they learn to trust you, and are better able to follow you and connect with you.

Your habits become your students’, kids’ or players’ habits. Be tough. Be firm. Be fair. Be friendly.


You must have a deep knowledge of your chosen area of expertise. You must be strong enough and have enough class and character to develop your knowledge into wisdom. Wisdom means having the ability to make great choices that make everyone around you better.

Knowledge combined with service to others is a great place to start. Knowledge is necessary but not sufficient. You may know a lot but if you don’t make good choices there is a disconnect and people see that.


This is the third attribute for becoming a connector and bringing people together. If you are truly inspired you can lead by your actions and your example.

Another term for motivation is love: I love what I am doing; I love coaching. Usually coaching defense is a hard sell in basketball, but I loved it so I could motivate my players to love it too. However, I’d have a tough time selling cars no matter how much I might know about them because I don’t have the same love for cars.


Toughness, knowledge and motivation are really important in developing the power to connect as a parent, coach, teacher or student. Once all three are operating well and are integrated you will be in the zone and your power to connect is increased tremendously. Trust is now embedded in your relationships. In basketball your players will want to get better for the team, they will want to learn the game, they will make better choices with each other and the coach. True connecting and togetherness just happens and the entire program is in the zone.

When the coach is ready in these four ways – toughness, wisdom, motivated by love of the game, in the zone – the players will appear. The same is true for players: get into the zone and the coach will appear.

Are you ready to make it happen?

February 22 Nugget

Jim Burson blog post; Monday Coaching Connection: 4 Steps to Having the Power to Connect ; p. 39 from his book "The Daily Nugget"

Prepare daily in all 4 ways for the power to connect. (click image to enlarge)

The Practice

When the player is ready the coach will appear. The reverse is also true.

The Practice is a concept or action for you to apply.

The Game

The coach and player must be on the same page. If they can work together, then it will be a lot easier for both to reach their full potential.

The Game gives insight and clarity to The Practice.

Word Thought


Word Thought is always related to The Practice and The Game. It provides a focus for the day and countless ways to engage others.

Your Monday Coaching Connection Challenge

Do you feel any disconnect with your team? With officials? With your family? If so, what are they? It’s so important that you identify and acknowledge this so that you can begin to take steps to rectify the situation. You must take the first step to connect.


Coaches: You might have a very specific situation you’re trying to improve that I haven’t addressed here. Perhaps I can help. I offer program and departmental advising services. I also offer one-to-one private coaching and I invite you to schedule a discovery session to see whether private coaching is right for you. The discovery session is free and lasts about 20 minutes. Click here to learn more and schedule your discovery session.

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Photo: © jane Fotolia

Photo: © Jim Burson, The Daily Nugget p. 39

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